corrucyst:

weed before beer. whish you were here

beer before weed. death on pale steed

dorothylarouge:

lagtrainzzz:

dorothylarouge:

My edo period samurai roommate keeps telling me how i’ll bring shame and dishonor to our apartment if I keep forgetting to wash the dishes. Like whatever dude, I’m not the one carrying on a passionate yet illicit affair with the daimyo’s daughter whose hand has already been promised to another.

もう大名に「真に申し訳ございませんでした」と言いましたよ！と、お前は、我の浮気を公衆に明かさないと言いました！！

Bullshit dude last night I saw you texting O-Sumire haikus comparing her to the flower which gives her her name

magicratfingers:

hollowboobtheory:

hollowboobtheory:

no but “He’s on a work trip with Jesus to afford your blueberry budget” is so fucking bad

work trip -> she’s gonna think he’s coming back

YOUR blueberry budget -> puts the blame on her even if that isn’t what you intended

your BLUEBERRY budget -> what if she just stops eating because she thinks that will being her dad back? bc girls growing up in the usa don’t already have enough of a complex around food i guess

your blueberry BUDGET -> teach your kid early to minimize herself and her needs by associating her favorite healthy food with her dad dying and leaving forever

congrats that’s the worst anyone’s ever done it

great question! its what Charlie Kirk’s widow told their 3yo daughter

valtsv:

valtsv:

anyone mind if i get a little bicurious on this suicide mission

oh i’m dying so badly that anyone who survives is afraid to ever love again

dooanuh:

(butch) dogs playing poker

groovysarity:

miiilowo:

‘Changer’ is what the slur for trans people would be if they were written into existence for a YA dystopian novel

sonandheirofnothinginparticular:

the-forest-library:

kill the imposter syndrome in your head because not only is there someone out there doing it worse than you, they’re also using chat gpt to do it

derezzcartes:

karynslee:

let god grant us a pope who doubts.

once again my favorite movie of the year has gone home without a best picture oscar and i am once AGAIN making it everyone’s problem

instagram / inprnt

saucefunk:

nespresso machine

scurvyboy:

the plot of the film i believe